My Quotes Dealing with Abuse Issues

17/06/11

Why take the drugs when you can live here & have a bad trip anytime you like? The only side effects are insanity with a bad attitude. No boredom, but it comes with a big price tag - you'll never know what is reality ever was... if there even IS a reality, one that seems never to go away. Welcome to the nightmare time. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

15/09/10

Do we ever in this life know why things turn out as they do? Some of what we think of as our worst flaws saves us much grief while some of our best strengths don't help when we think they should. Still, all works together for us in ways we don't always see. Nothing is as it appears. So, I say relax more, enjoy, & work with whatever happens. Might as well smile, too. It's free. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

21/01/11

Brave smiles to hide the tears ripping a living heart asunder. Such sad eyes. Why can I not reach you with my hands? You are so far. But, I can reach you with my heart. Can I move mountains to love you? Will it be enough? So many mountains need a very big heart. I can & I must try. Love & Life demand it. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

22/01/11

Decades later she still heard the terrified screams, smelt the blood. The words "she talked" burned, locked her in an extreme-still silence. No visible sign of emotion was safe. Ultra-sweet compliance was her defiance & survival. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw, Baby Tears

25/01/11

Moment by moment I am training myself to respect all of me as a whole & worthwhile person. I am learning to turn scared into sacred. I am learning that I really am who I am, & who I am is exactly who I was meant to be. I am learning this is the same for all my relations in creation. AND, it is a joy. ~ Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw

Scandal Mongers

Scandal Mongers

Off on a tangent, as though knowing all,

The reality of facts ne’er from their lips fall.

The heartbreak of scandal on innocent heads

Embarrassed beyond all shades of reds…

Speculation’s a game that has many risks.

Judgment’s a call of many tsk, tsk, tsks.

I told you so goes up the cry

Even if the truth be there to deny.

ã4 May 1999, Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw.

Please Don’t Leave Me Here All Alone

Please Don’t Leave Me Here All Alone

Away you go on a trip of which I cannot join,

And I am afraid.

Afraid you’ll go never to return;

Afraid you’ll die;

Frightened I’ll never see you alive again;

Frightened I’ll be alone

Forever…

Left behind…

Forgotten and unloved…

Unclaimed.

Unwanted forever.

ã19 December 1993, Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw.

Fine, Fine, We’re All Fine, Thank You

Fine, Fine, We’re All Fine, Thank You

It isn’t there.

I didn’t see.

I don’t know.

Why ask me?

I didn’t feel it.

I didn’t touch. 

I didn’t fake it.

No, not much.

I don’t remember.

What do you mean?

Do not disturb.

Don’t be seen.

Do not talk.

Play pretend.

Rigid smiles.

No more friends.

I didn’t hear it.

I didn’t say.

Evade the question.

No dismay.

Blank expression.

Vacant eyes.

Avoidance is

A ghast disguise.

ã8 January 1991, Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw.

Panic Attack

Panic Attack

Cold, slimy fingers creeping up my spine…

   Body hair stands up.

      GASP!

Can’t breathe.

   Pounding heart.

      Dry tongue.

         Sweat.

A nameless terror tingles my colon.

   A knot here…

      And there…

PAIN!!

   Tense.

Eyes w-I-d-e open…

   Yet blind.

Straining ears are deaf.

Chilled,

   Yet burning up

      By turns.

Racing thoughts.

Escape!!!

Yet paralyzed.

Even tears have fled the scene…

   Silently screaming

IN PANIC!!!!!

Yet remaining

   Deadly

      Still.

ã22 October 1992, Daphne Yvonne Bradshaw.